You'd think that people nowadays are being "caring" to others, they just love making assumptions about the life you've gone through, how and why it happened but they never asked question to the person who has gone through it. We are quick to judge and never have the sense to go and maybe talk and maybe that person just needs someone to talk to.
We all are being so individualistic, some give excuses as to "try to find their true selves" which I find is bullshit. For example, you are 24 years old, and you suddenly said that exact phrase, to "discover who you are", then what/who the fuck were you before that? You were a Hollow for 23 years? Or maybe a soulless body vessel which somehow God just blew a soul in your body and you just "came to life" after 24 years? I just don't buy it. We all have a purpose, you just need to be diligent enough to find it. I have problems in this department where searching the purpose as to what you can contribute to this society that expects nothing but perfection from you because you're not screwed up loosely on the head.
I am in this position where I myself do not know what I stand for and the purpose as a human being living in this world where Angels and Demons are waging countless wars and I am caught in the middle. Most people tell me that I change so fast from being this outgoing guy into a shy recluse where crowded places make me sick and nauseous. I myself do not know why and people assume as if they can read what's in my mind. They do not want to see what's in it. I do not want to see it. I wish my imagination is dead so I won't replay those things I imagined since my pre-teen years.
I hate being in a crowd. It overwhelms my existence. My presence where I feel like a abandoned useless soul locked in this limiting body vessel. I want to announce my existence on this Earth, telling people "Hey, I exist, don't ignore me. I just need a friend to talk to and someone to watch my back if I ever stumble on an obstacle of Life". Those times you will meet some people like yourself, but they are still blind and haven't opened their eyes to see the real world we live in. They choose to be ignored, to just let this Earth fall down to shit and hoping it won't get dirty. Well, bad news, you won't solve anything if you don't do anything.
You also get those people who overdo it, shouting senseless profanities with a hoarse voice, pronouncing complicated words just so the simpletons think you are smart therefore think highly of you just because you read those words in a dictionary just 10 minutes ago and used it once. I find these people a disease. Sometimes, at least the term Ignorance is Bliss can be implemented in this case, but to a certain extent where ignorance will ultimately bring ruin, but for those who talk too much, taking major attention seeking to a whole new level which can annoy people so much they just wanna punch the lights out of you. This type of person I hate so much. They pick on those who are silent. They prey on the weak and make others believe the words they said. I find it repulsive that these people breaks through the loophole where the fools have more confidence but the wise people hold their silence.
For me, I just wanna seek acceptance, and do something worthwhile where I can tell other people what is going on in this world, what is the stance of our human level at this point, how far have we strayed from the righteous path that God has given us to live The Ideal Life. We are blind to see the purpose which we are born to do God's bidding. Whatever else that we do is optional. The sole physical purpose of living is to survive in this world. You see, that way of life is boring. So, as smart and creative we have become, we create distractions to pass time by so by the time we die, it will feel like a heart beat. To survive, you need shelter, food and water. Basic things to survive. After that, you need to work for the food, you hunt, maybe farm. To add more people so more people can do it to cut the time cost, is to procreate. You have children. The children will help you with work until it's time they take over and repeat the cycle. That's the basic in living. However, we create some distractions in life, maybe adding games, story telling, arts and craft, you learn to navigate the sea. From here, to give the short version of it, we expand.
Fast forward to today. Living basically now it almost impossible as we have institutionalize and commercialize living. We create jobs, but we choose people instead of randomly accepting. We evaluate people to progress in this world, by education, from Kindergarten, Primary School, Secondary School, College, University. There are too many people living, we weed out the dummies and preserve the best of the best. We make education important yet we discriminate the disadvantaged ones for whatever natural causes that made them incapable of achieving a higher understanding of learning. We create frustrated people, those who are stuck in a rut. Those we vilify because they are stupid for not progressing further in life, being a Somebody just so they have a paper telling them they did it. We brush them off, and here, we have either two people, those who try to find another way to improve themselves so they can go up to the level of those fortunate to be educated, and the vengeful people who would love nothing but to destroy and bring down the fortunate ones.
You see, that is just one of the subsets of unfairness in life where how we tackle the problem is what we fail to see. Those who are born not perfect, will breed jealousy to those who have perfect physique, tall, dark and handsome for Men, short, slender and curvy for Women. People who are born crippled, they will forever live as a handicap not only literally, but figuratively as well. No one want to hire a cripple, especially the mentally disabled ones. When I look at it, these circumstances is what make or break a person living in this world where now rules of the human and the idiocy of the overzealous leaders rule for what they say, but not what they do.
I can go on and on about this philosophical stuff, probably basic theology as well, but I think that those lost in translation, are actually not seeing the real picture. I can sum it up as this:
You are born to live in this world to please God by doing his bidding and leaving what God forbids. In the same time, you need to survive in this world. You need to eat, drink, have a safe place to live and procreate. So, you work. You work until you die and your children will take over. In the meantime, you do God's bidding, by praying, helping people, no crimes committed, rarely sin and when you die, ideally you will be awarded for your good soul to go to heaven. However, doing the opposite, will result will be the other way down.
OK, it's not practical because that is only in theory. Now, there are too many distractions that makes us hard to concentrate in living this ideal Life. As I said, Human Rules, the Disbelievers crop up because the unfortunate things happening to them that turns them into Godless souls and probably mistakes you've done that results in failure such as misinterpretation of what God tells you as you are taking it the wrong way without learning the words that was passed down to you as a guide in living on Earth, and yes, not educating yourself enough to learn the Wonders of the World.
It's complicated, but it's actually easy when you see it. I hope somebody will read and understand this. It is a long post, I know, but I need to get these thoughts out of my head. I find it interesting on what people think and how they end up later in Life. Try to find the basic grasp of Living and you might or might not see it first, but eventually, you will.
This is the End of the post. Yeah, see you next time. My head feels light. Will need a rest. Thanks if you've read this far. I understand if you don't understand, I'm typing this as these thoughts come out of my head, this is not scripted beforehand. It's called free-flow writing. Well, thanks and Peace Be Upon You.
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